T - Techy kids

My hypothetical kids were never going to watch TV, own computer games or have Mobile phones. My hypothetical kids would need nothing more that a good book and a bit of playdough. We certainly wouldn't be considering buying those hypothetical kids an ipod touch for their 3rd and 5th Christmas.

However, my real, breathing, demanding and digital kids are very different!

The TV is the 6th member of our family (they don't understand why he doesn't come on family days out with us) , the ipad is one of their toys and they laugh in the face of mobile phone security pins!

So these techy kids amazed me twice this week...

1) My Mum rang me up to tell me that after my 3 year old had been playing on her ipad, she recieved an email saying he add ordered a £90 electric fire from 1-click-to-buy amazon which would be delivered in the morning.

2) I had to explain to my 5yo that not everyone can pause live TV. And that unfortunately we are part of that few!

This led me to think of many future conversations I will have with my kids where they say "Shut up!" in disbelief (Essex accent optional)

1) "What? You had to go a Library? Why?"

2) "You couldn't pause live TV? What did you do if you needed a wee?"

3) "You wrote letters!"

4) " You had to start every Facebook update with 'is' "

5) "You didn't photoshop your pictures! You must have looked terrible"

6) "You didn't have a mobile till you were 18! How did you tell the time?"

7) "What? When mobiles first came out nobody texted?"

8) "You wrote your exams by hand!"

9) "You used money - wasn't that in the olden days"

10) "What the hell is a pager?"

11) "Nokia? What's a Nokia?"

When Nokia Ruled the World!

But the truth is, this is the world they live! And the digital transformation means it is a world that revolves around them. Then can pause the television whilst they run up for a wee and not have to desperately hold on till an advert break! They can find any TV programme on the internet and watch till their heart's content. Any piece of homework is only a copy and paste click away!

I have to except this is part of their lives and that the digital world is only going to get faster! Cbeebies is only going to become a better babysitter, it may even provide digital snacks one day! And they will run with it, as I jog slowly behind. I guess my job isn't to prevent them having access, but to protect them whilst they do.

Anyway, back to the comedy...

Please make me laugh... tell me what your kids will be unable to believe about the world you grew up in!

T - Thomas the Tank Engine

Thomas played an important part in my eldest's pre-school years.

He loved him.

Wholeheartedly.

He took him everywhere.

We have the photos to prove it...

Thomas on a sledge

Thomas in the bath



Thomas doing the Limbo

Thomas at Thomas Land

In fact, he appears in that many photos he could have his own album.

But then, out of the blue, after they aired Disney's Cars on the BBC one Christmas, it all changed...

Whenever I watch Toy Story I think that is how Thomas must have felt when Lightening McQueen came to our House. One day, Thomas fell from his hand, the tracks started collecting dust, his favourite colour changed from Blue to Red and no longer did we hear "Peep Peep" echo through the house.

And for us, the Grown ups, a wealth of knowledge was suddenly out of use. We had memorised ALL the Engine's names, knew the Sodor songs like nursery rhymes, watched every feature film at least 20 times, bought every piece of Thomas merchandise... and for what? For a red, American racing car to come in and steal the limelight. My sister took it the hardest. She still can't find a nice word to say about Mr. McQueen.

But hope was not last, there was always his brother. Our Thomas knowledge would not be wasted, the toys would be played with once more. For two long years he showed barely a flicker of interest, then the other week. BOOM! Thomas love.

Check out the first picture I managed to get with the three of them together (or should I say 4?)



Look who's back!

And look at the baby's face! Smitten at 3 months! Yay!

T- Toilet Visits

Apparently, so I've been told, when you are pregnant it is legal to do a wee anywhere - ANY-WHERE! This includes a policeman's helmet; a policeman is under legal obligation to offer his helmet to a pregant woman who has been caught short.

Unfortunately, this gives me little comfort in the early hours of the morning as I waddle sleepily towards the toilet for the fourth time!

"It's preparing you for when they're here" knowing Mums would tell me, their voices encased with sadistic glee. At least when they're here the sleepless nights would be gratified with something small and wonderful to love, not just the knowledge that I am too fat to control my bladder and I if a policeman was here in bed with me he would have to offer me his helmet.